Give the Gift of Reactionary Propaganda

Christmas is coming. I have suggestions for you.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, a time for extended families to get together, eat Turkey, and have political arguments. Be nice and don't neener dance. Try to reassure those suffering from Trump Derangement Syndrome that by earlier metrics of Left and Right, Trump is a centrist. For the most part, he is a ruder cruder mix of Jimmy Carter and John F. Kennedy. Then try to divert the subject to football, hunting, or old photos.

The time to push the Reactionary Agenda is Christmas!

You can do it gently, subtly, and have your friends and family thank you for the propaganda -- because they will be entertained by that propaganda. The propaganda I have in mind was not intended to be propaganda; it was for-profit entertainment from a time when Hollywood still served America more or less.

(And remember, if you want to join the Secret Society of Swell Reactionaries, the instructions are in the chat area available to all subscribers.)

Prior to 1970, Hollywood was largely cool with family, patriotism, and The American Way. Edgy subversion was limited to some sexual innuendo and suggesting that Negroes could be full-fledged citizens. Seriously, if you are a parent, keep your kids away from most sitcoms made after 1970. Fill your kids stockings with DVDs of family sitcoms where TV Dad was a font of wisdom instead of a complete dope. If you have friends or family members with kids, do them a favor and give them or their children DVDs of pre-1970 television shows aimed at children.

I will give some specific recommendations in just a moment. But first, a quick summary of why pre 1970 television -- and some movies -- is such great propaganda for Swell Reactionaries:

• The United States was overwhelmingly White and had high trust societies within. It was OK to be White. And it was OK to hang out with your own kind. (And this is the downside of pre 1970s TV, the US also had non Whites who were indeed mistreated. And unfortunately, there is very little pre 1970 television with strong Black roles that aren't Star Trek or star Bill Cosby. Bummer.)

• Christianity was still the dominant religion, even if the moguls who ran Hollywood mostly weren't.

• The limited number of televisions meant that prime time television shows tried to aim at broad audiences. Except for Saturday morning cartoons, kid friendly shows were generally also watchable by adults. Watching TV was a family experience.

• You could be a Good Liberal back then by defending the Bill of Rights. I like the Bill of Rights.

• And yes, there were anti-communist liberals back then. JFK ran as a hawk.

• Actors were expected to work. Physical comedy was common. Norman Lear cheapened the sitcom by replacing physical comedy with people hurling insults at each other.

• Advertising to children was still legal.

• Shows had to be good enough to be worth watching even if interrupted by commercials. (Ergo, the experience of watching old shows on DVDs is way better than the original experience. A valid Christmas gift.)

Live Action TV Comedies

Pick just about any family comedy from before 1970 and you are good to go -- save for My Three Sons which is both bad and can be interpreted as a gay marriage situation. The Brady Bunch is the one I remember the most from my childhood. The subversive Reactionary message is that there were once high trust societies in California. Contrast the original show with The Brady Bunch Movie from 1995. The latter is arguably the most Dissident Right movie made in the last half century, beating out Dirty Harry, Conan the Barbarian, Demolition Man, Starship Troopers, and even Barbie. But it only works for those who saw the original show.

If you know late Boomers who grew up on The Brady Bunch, make sure they see the movie. Then have The Talk.

The other subversive messages in old family comedies include dads that aren't dopes and the fact that even blue collar men could support a family on a single income.

Gilligan's Island. A childhood without Gilligan's Island is a deprived childhood. Cable TV used to ensure that Gilligan's Island was available 24/7 if one flipped through the channels. Alas, those civilized days are over, and there are children growing up deprived. And we have a mental health crisis. Coincidence? I think not! While Gilligan's Island is a kid show, it is watchable, and even entertaining, for adults. And it taught some important lessons. Ginger's complaints about lecherous producers predated the MeToo movement by decades. The episode where Gilligan is made policeman teaches a super important lesson on why government should not be the enforcer of all morality. Extreme Reactionary element: Thurston Howell III is traveling with suitcases of $1000 bills and isn't wanted for money laundering. (And $1000 would be at least $10,000 in today's money!)

The Beverly Hillbillies. This is one of American Television's early masterpieces. Yes, it is silly and slapstick, but there is some wonderful social commentary. The late second season episodes where a sociology student tries to "rescue" the Hillbillies are priceless. The Beverly Hillbillies is a very rare example of early American television with real continuity. The episodes are truly meant to be watched in order. The first season is a true masterpiece, written by one man, Paul Henning. The show ran for 9 seasons, 5 of which are on DVD. Unfortunately, the sixth season, where the Hillbillies go to England, is not yet on DVD. The show features frequent use of firearms for self defense with only short stints in jail. And it repeatedly shows where rural wisdom beats college degrees -- even as it makes fun of rural ignorance. The show plays fair. And it's very funny. For kids and adults. (In the early Spiderman comic Aunt May is worried about missing The Beverly Hillbillies when she is kidnapped by Doctor Octopus. The show was that popular.)

The Andy Griffith Show. While this show is not as reliably funny as the ones above, it has its great moments. But what truly stands out about The Andy Griffith Show is that it is truly a great example of utopian fiction. Utopian fiction has to be comedic in order to be entertaining, since a good utopia almost by definition, is low on drama and pathos. While this show has very funny for kids episodes, I'd would not give it to kids. This is one to give to adults who don't realize that there was once a Good America. This show embodies the idea of high trust common sense over procedure and excessive safetyism. Barney Fife represents the over eager Deep State while Andy represents strength with restraint. The episodes with Otis the drunk illustrate a double-plus important principle: repeat offense should lead to repeat punishment at the same level. No Three Strikes and You Are Out. Repeated offense should only lower the presumption of innocence. Otis locks himself up when he is drunk in public and lets himself out when he sobers up. There is a lesson here.

The Munsters. Plenty of physical comedy to entertain the very young, but reasonably entertaining to the not so young. Reactionary elements: Blue collar Frankenstein can support the family on one income. In one episode Herman Munster gets insomnia and takes walks in the park at midnight. Panic ensues. But in the end the judge affirms Herman's right to take a walk in the park at midnight. Try doing that yourself these days; have your lawyer on speed dial when you do so, however.

Family Affair. I disliked this show as a kid, and this is not really a kid's show. It's an adult show featuring [overly] cute kids. Brian Keith plays a playboy wealthy engineer who has a butler to keep track of the many women he is dating. His offscreen brother dies and he is stuck taking care of his children: two around 5 or 6 and one a teenager. This is one to give to your cat lady friends/family and/or intentionally childless couples. Reactionary element: Manhattan is portrayed as high trust enough that a six year old can wander around on his own and chat with workers on a construction site.

Get Smart. This one is just plain fun -- for all ages. Don Adams' performances are incredible. Attempts are rebooting the franchise with other actors have failed, for a reason.

Batman. Scary adventure for little kids. Kind of stupid for a little bit older kids. Great comedy for kids and grownups who get the joke. Surprisingly clever social satire for the sophisticated. Incredibly sexy villainesses. Reactionary elements: lots of all-in-good-fun ethnic humor, potshots at radical feminism, interesting takes on civil liberties and criminal reform, and the origin of Skull and Bones revealed. A sample is in order:

Cartoons for the Children

Once upon a time, the big three television networks devoted all of Saturday mornings to pure children's television. Then, the Ninnies Against Exposing Kids to Capitalism made the arrangement unprofitable.

Much of Saturday morning TV was cheap junk, but there are some gems worth forwarding to future generations. Let's start with the cartoons that were produced by a company founded by advertising executives who had the account for General Mills: Total Television.

Underdog. Cheap animation but clever writing and a great theme song. I've heard liberal commentators say this was their favorite cartoon growing up, so this one is probably safe to give to your liberal sister's young kids. Reactionary element: all-in-good-fun ethnic humor.

Tennessee Tuxedo. Good humor, featuring the voice of the great Don Adams. This is an unusual example of a commercial television cartoon that includes an educational element. Most episodes include a short lecture on a technology or career by Phineas J. Whoopie. Reactionary element: Tennessee repeatedly gets in trouble by being overconfident and impatiently walking out of Phineas J. Whoopie's lectures before he is finished. Solomon would approve of this cartoon.

In the late 1960s, Hanna Barbara and other studios went overboard with delightfully violent superhero cartoons. Then, Ninnies Against Testosterone initiated a crackdown, and good preparation for manhood entertainment was replaced by H.R. Pufnstuff and other garbage. The Man of the Atom tells the tale:

History on the Rhyme

Among my earliest memories was watching The Herculoids. No backstories, no fluff. Just good wholesome continuous violence. The artwork was great. The writing, nearly nonexistent. Reactionary elements: Teaches proper gender roles, "Gloop, Gleep, protect Tarra!" and the importance of protecting your homeworld from invaders. An early innoculation of Herculoids has been shown to be 97% effective against later gurlimanification.

Hanna Barbara cranked out a bunch of formulaic superhero cartoons, such as Space Ghost and Mightor, but they also put some effort into The Fantastic Four.

For elementary school age boys there is Johnny Quest, which was originally a prime time cartoon, with much higher production values. I fear that parts of this cartoon have been memory holed due to political incorrectness. We need DVDs placed in circulation before the ninnies memory hole the entire cartoon.

Finally, I'll give an honorable mention to a superhero cartoon made after the crackdown: Super Friends. This cartoon is super cringe, so it is only suitable as a gag gift. Consider it for your fraternity Christmas party. Reactionary element: In order to get past the censors they made the cackling villains good intentioned(!) The heroes do battle against liberal doo-gooders, essentially. Also, the third episode of Season 1 is a warning against letting robots do all the work and humans living on a guaranteed income.

For Adults

Many of the already mentioned physical comedies are just as suitable for adults without children as for adults with children. For maximum comedy plus reactionary message, I'd recommend The Beverly Hillbillies. For maximum pure comedy, Get Smart. For hipsters, go with Batman.

I'll throw in a pair of comedies that are not aimed at children: Yes, Minister and its sequel Yes, Prime Minister. These are British comedies made in the 1970s and 80s, so I'm breaking my original rule here. The comedy is mostly verbal, but incredibly sophisticated verbal comedy. These are great gifts for your PBS watching friends and family. Reactionary element: Public Choice economics and Pournelle's Iron Law of Bureaucracy from the framework of the show. It's all about politicians being manipulated by the Deep State. Ultra relevant. Ultra funny. Buy yourself a copy if you haven't already.

But not everyone is into comedy, so I'll throw in a few dramas:

The Twilight Zone. Creepy anthology show with strong moral messages. Arguably television's first masterpiece. Used to be a standard rerun show, but is slowly disappearing from public awareness. The reboot that came out in the mid 1980s is also great.

The Prisoner. I'm referring to the original, with Patrick McGoohan. A surrealistic mixture of spy show, science fiction, and meditation on freedom and free will. This is a good gift for the artsy-fartsy and the sophisticated. Reactionary element: the Deep State is the villain, and the hero struggles against mind games in every episode. Rather relevant for this age.

The original Star Trek. Sad to say, but there are people who grew up watching the badly written Next Generation and even more deplorable spinoffs without ever watching the most excellent original. The acting is stage level. The background music, movie quality and varies greatly by episode. Reactionary elements: while the show was liberal for its day, it is surprisingly conservative by modern standards. Star Trek portrays a future where The Singularity didn't happen. Humans are still human, and that's a Good Thing. The show features repeated warnings against genetic engineering, robots, overly powerful computers, and tinkering with the human spirit. It even features a few Christianity head nods. While anti-racist, it was also anti woke. And while somewhat feminist, the show repeatedly taught that a warship should be commanded by an alpha male. There's even an early episode, The Enemy Within, where the transporter splits Kirk in two, with one Kirk being his goody intellectual side, and the other being his inner Donald Trump. The good Kirk is unfit for command.

I'm tempted to write an entire essay on the conservative/reactionary elements of the original Star Trek, but that's for another day.

That's All Folks

I was going to make some movie recommendations as well, but this post is getting long, and I want to get it out the door in time for ye to read it before Black Friday. Happy Thanksgiving!